Missile

I once more made a new profile pic for Facebook with Photoshop.
Because at times it becomes necessary to deploy these type of missiles, often even in large quantities, for devastating preemptive strikes.

:D

There, I fixed it

I already finished fixing my Watain back patch mentioned in the previous post, reshaping it in the way it was meant to look according to the photo in the eBay auction. I had to stitch all the way around to reattach the two layers, then to remove the parts still left of the square white seam.

Before.

Fixed it!

Now I only still need to sew it to my jacket.

Fixed with pins, ready to sew on.
That funky rocket stuff on top is my bedding. LOL

If this is not a Becoming...

The Walpurgis Night was glorious. Wild dances I danced here in my secret lair, with the serpentine force taking hold of the spine of a war machine. I'm so grateful to still be able to do this,as it was exactly 2 years ago, the day before Walpurgis 2015, that I was diagnosed with spinal disc damage and thought I might already have to put an early end to my current incarnation. But it only shows once more that modern science and medicine is anything but as omniscient as it is all too often taken to be, and the fallacy of trusting in anyone or anything but in Father Satan.

Make this war machine great again! :D
(Messy hair after dancing)

 This war machine, she's better than she's ever been before. Yes, I danced long and hard on Walpurgis and felt still somewhat affected the next day - more so by the herbs I had smoked - and I went for a run and expected to perform rather poorly, but again I beat my own time on that 9K route by nearly a minute, down to 46 now (make no mistake, the route covers 100 meters of elevation, rather steep in places!).

There have also been some complications lately though. Among other things, a very important & expensive item from eBay still hasn't arrived after over 4 weeks, and another is significantly different from the photo in the description. Here's what it ought to have looked like, and instead it came in ugly, simple rectangle shape and very poor quality, fraying at the edges. I first meant to return it but the seller didn't respond in over a week, and I wasn't able to find this same one anywhere else either, and so I decided to reshape and fix it myself instead - fortunately I'm reasonably good at such crafts, after all. For it's very important to me that it has that tapering shape - this is a back patch to be sewn on a jacket, and the tapering shape it to emphasize my very broad shoulders and narrow waist

 

Because, yes, in my own ways I'm extremely vain. No, you'll never see me wearing makeup, and yes, I got messy hair in the photo above. In fact I got messy hair most of the time, being an athlete. I don't give a shit about being messy, smelly, and ragged. My kind of vanity is in being strong, imposing, intimidating. I'm a monster-trucking warrior, after all!

Besides this I've been spending much time on a story I'm writing - in my mind it's nearly all of the time even.

It started when rereading a story I had written years ago, that one was based on some dream I think but I found it was quite contrived. I spontaneously made a little change, and then I found myself tossing out most of it and writing a whole new story, this time with much more elaborate dialog. It's dialog for the most part. All I kept is basically the setting in Amsterdam and the "I'm-gonna-throw-you-into-the-canal" scene. Well, I think the old version is probably still somewhere on here, I haven't checked, LOL. Assuming pretty much no one's reading my stuff anyway. I'll probably end up posting the new one here as well when it's finished. Or if.

I still keep editing, making changes, letting it evolve; I got no plan for it, and I'm not writing it for anyone but myself.

Like all of the rest, for the most part. This blog is just like a graffiti in cyberspace saying "I was here". Here on Earth, for a while, with no true home here nor among the stars...

Saying, "from the wells of night to the gulfs of space, and from the gulfs of space to the wells of night..."

For this is where I dwell, unseen. All that occurs remains on the inside. I don't post very often, yet I talk here so much more than anywhere - here and on Facebook. Else I usually have only myself and my Master to talk to. As for the story....

In case someone should want to read it later,

****************** SPOILER ALERT ******************

the interesting twist in the story will be that he pretends to be Julian Sands (the actor who played the Warlock in the movie) still playing the role of the Warlock, while actually things are backwards and he really is Satan's son. This will probably be pretty obvious to everyone but myself (the version of myself in the story, that is), so this spoiler alert is probably redundant. But just in case.

******************** END SPOILER *******************

If this (ephemeral life) is not a Becoming then it is nothing at all, and this might be one reason for my writing. A foundation for what is to be. The surface layer of reality is just a wasteland of material things, of particles and radiation that are all just eventually turning to muck via entropy.

It's pretty much proven that purely physical agents could function just the same without consciousness. Then why should consciousness "evolve", just to stare at the meaninglessness of its own fleeting existence? Existing in such a state constitutes torture, but torture is always inflicted intentionally and by malice. So I find it reasonable to think that only a malicious god would impose such an existence on his creatures - and out the window goes your materialism; reductio ad absurdum.

And this is only another one of the many arguments I found over time...

There, I already ended up debunking materialism once more although I had no such intention for this post. Whatever, just rambling. But it sums up my life pretty well: workout, some art/craft, and searching for answers. And worship, of course.

Dance (at least my kind) falls in between there: part workout, part art, and mainly ritual.

I've also been doing some beadwork again, it's still unfinished, but couldn't resist making this medallion...