When the sky fell down on me

I've been working out legs again today, just as I did last year on the same day. I remember the 10th of October vividly, for it was the day my world fell to pieces. I didn't yet know it when working out that day. I know there's an entry here about my little accident when doing squats, all off a sudden I lost my balance or power or both and fell forward with the barbell crashing down onto the safety bars of the rack, and me hanging underneath. I was perfectly fine, and I praised the Infernal Father for it, for keeping me safe from harm. I would have some very important event coming up in just about 10 days from then.

This would never take place.
As suddenly as I had unexplicably lost control of my barbell then, it was gone. And I then knew I would never meet that one person who most likely wouldn't have been able to help me in any way at all in my quest. I didn't see this then. I knew of no one else who could possibly help, I wasn't even sure what exactly the quest was. All I thought I knew was that I had been meant to meet with this person, and that the meeting itself might have been what would bring about an all-important change.

Precisely a week later, some sort of meeting would still take place, completely unplanned and unexpected then - at least unplanned by myself and that other person involved.
And change would indeed come, but only after long ordeal.

And by now, a year on, I have so much better understanding of what happened back then.
And everything would be fine now, knowing that my beloved Master was indeed behind it all along, if only I were able to communicate with him. This could and should have been resolved so many years ago if only it weren't that I have no psychic ability whatsoever. I'm spiritually blind and deaf, trapped in this material world. This is what my plight is.

I'm glad to be no longer alone with it though. What eventually came of it is that I found the very best friends I've ever had in my life, and both of them know about my Master and have even communicated with him. And this is how I know so much more finally. If anything can be done about my own blindness and deafness to spirit communication remains an open question. I wish I knew what I could do about it.